Don't Spare the Hair

At the time of year when the sun doesn’t keep us warm because it goes to bed early, in the evening, our humans burn dead trees in the hole in the wall with fire.  It’s a particularly cozy place to take a nap.

In the last cold season, there were lots of days when our humans didn’t burn dead trees.  Mummy said it was because it was a Spare the Hair day.  I told her that she should fix that because my hair doesn’t need sparing.  It likes being warm.  I guess she must have found the right humans to talk to about it because so far in this cold season, my hair has not been spared once.

Talisker

Bad Clocks

For the last 2 days, Daddy has been giving us dinner an hour later than usual.  I tried gently pawing him as a reminder but he says it’s not his fault.  The clocks decided on Saturday night to change our feeding time.  These are obviously bad clocks who prey on trusting humans, because the one in my tummy doesn’t think our dinner time has changed.

Talisker

Dogs Don't Drive

Daddy just got a new motorized dog carrier … well … new to him.  I accidentally broke the last one.   I didn’t mean to but I really wanted to be in the front with Daddy.  I didn’t know that motorized dog carriers take commands from the circle in the front and jumping on it is not a good idea.

Tobermory

This is a cautionary tale for those of you out there who have your dogs roaming freely in your car.  We have always had restraints in one of our cars as it’s a convertible for the safety of the dogs, but never thought to have them in our SUV.  Luckily, no humans or dogs were injured in this accident as we were moving slowly on a private road, but had it been on a freeway, it would have been a different story.  We now have restraints in the SUV too for all of our safety.

Mummy

Human Training Standards

I’m Dougal.  I’m Chief of Security at the kennel of Talisker’s and Tobermory’s Mummy’s parents.  She’s visiting us this week along with her litter mate and her human puppies.  They’ve been spending every day chasing lots of other human puppies in floating human carriers.  Their Chief of Security, Bone has come too to make sure that they get properly dried off and warmed up at the end of the day.

I think Talisker and Tobermory have been a little lax in training their humans.  My humans are extremely obedient in responding to begging, especially my Daddy.  All I have to do is look at him and he gives me food.  It doesn’t matter where we are.  It even works when they are sitting down at the table to eat.  I tried this with Talisker and Tobermory’s Mummy, but nothing.  I increased the level of stare and even brought Bone in to help, but still nothing.  I consider begging to be one of the most important things to teach humans to respond to, but maybe in California dogs have different standards from those in England.

Dougal

In the Dog House

Last weekend Daddy bent Mummy’s motorized dog carrier. We thought she’d growl at him like she does when we do bad things so we hid because she’s really scary when she growls. Instead she went very quiet and said she was going to put Daddy in a dog house.  Since we live in the same kennel as our humans, this must be a dog house and since Daddy is still here, I assume Mummy must be talking about this one.  It has particularly comfy beds and sofas so I don’t understand why putting Daddy in this dog house is much of a punishment.

Talisker

The Bird that Mocks

There’s a very loud bird that starts to scream outside our kennel late at night just as we are trying to go to sleep.  Mummy says it’s mocking us.  Personally, I think it’s jealous.  After all, it’s the one outside sitting in a tree while we’re inside, curled up on our nice comfy beds.

Talisker

The Great Escape

Our humans have been restricting our adventures just lately.  All we do is go on a short neighborhood sniff after the sun has gone to bed.  They say it’s too hot outside which we really don’t understand because it looks fine to us from the inside.

Today a human stopped by to talk to the small creatures living under our garden about ceasing their construction of little mountains.  After he left, we went outside to inspect them and much to my delight spotted an open gate.  When your humans have been depriving you of adventures, it stands to reason that when the opportunity presents itself, it’s only reasonable to take yourself on one.  Mummy was busy with her writing box so I thought it was safe to leave her unwatched for a little while.

Tobermory almost immediately fell afoul of the number one rule of adventures; avoid distractions.  He found a ball and was so enthralled by it that he didn’t notice the group of human puppies approaching who suspected that he was on an unauthorized adventure so took him straight back to our kennel.  He of course refuses to return the ball.  He says that since he found it, it’s his.

I kept my focus and continued on my mission.  I was beginning to get lost so stopped to ask some friendly looking female human puppies for directions.  Despite my protestations, one insisted on using her talking box to call the number on my tag.  I wanted to continue on my adventure, but they tricked me with cuddles and treats until Mummy arrived in her motorized dog carrier.

Although it pains me to say it, I think our humans may have been correct in restricting our adventures.  I was starting to get really quite hot and thirsty and have to admit to being more than a little grateful for the ride home.

Talisker