Respecting Space

One thing I have learnt from my extensive studies of human behavior is that they respect personal space very seriously.  My brother doesn't seem to understand this concept.  My sleeping box is MY sleeping box.

Talisker

Dependence Day

Friday was a day when humans in this land celebrate being independent.

According to the writing box, an independent human is supposed to be good at doing things on their own.   The logical assumption would therefore be that on Independence Day they would celebrate by taking part in solo activities.  I don’t think they understand this because they gather in packs, drinking falling over juice and eating plates of human kibble that they bring to share with the others.  If that’s what they’re supposed to be doing, shouldn’t the day really be called Dependence Day?

Talisker

Socializing Humans

When Tobermory and I were puppies we went to school so that our humans could learn how to hold our leashes properly.  The teacher told them how important it is to be social and for safety, take their security detail with them as much as possible when doing so.  Apparently some humans don’t understand this which must be particularly stressful for the dogs involved.  How can you perform your duties properly if the humans in your care are not in your line of site?

When it’s warm outside, Howling Human season starts.  This is an extremely good opportunity for human socializing.  Most weekends we take ours to gather with their friends in a field in our town and drink falling over juice accompanied by bread with hard cow juice on top.  A small group of humans stand on a big box in the middle of the field and howl while they pull strings on wooden boxes and bang big round pots with sticks.  I don’t really understand the attraction, but it seems to make them happy and we get to hang with our friends like Truman and perfect our begging technique.

Talisker

Truman's Spa

Truman invited us over this evening for a casual game of fetch and to view what he thinks is his new giant outdoor dog water bowl.  You have to understand that although Truman’s mother was a fish retriever like us, he really hasn’t inherited the water gene.  I pointed out to him that it is not a water bowl, but a dog spa.  He didn’t believe me so of course I had to demonstrate.  I admit it is a little tight and obviously has a one dog capacity, but it felt pretty good so I stand by my original observation … definitely a dog spa.

Talisker

How Not to Chase a Goose

Humans are good at lots of things, but there are a few that they really should just leave in the hands of dogs.  One of those is playing fetch and we just discovered that another is bird chasing.

There is a big field near our kennel where there are a lot of big birds called geese.  They are particularly messy which upsets the humans who go there to play when they aren’t out earning dog biscuits.  My dearly departed older brother, Bowmore and I tried once to help persuade them to leave by chasing them which would have been very effective had Mummy not growled at us and made us get back in the motorized dog carrier.

Last week our humans took us with them to see how they chase geese.  We climbed in one of a long line of boxes attached to each other that were pulled by a big black tube with a chimney at the front.  The line of boxes took us around the field in search of geese, and sure enough, there were still lots of them which isn’t very surprising.  A row of boxes pulled by a black tube really isn’t very scary.  Whilst I understand that for humans who are fundamentally lazy, this is a good way of searching for geese while they are sitting down, they will never persuade them to leave if they don’t ask the black tube to stop so they can jump out of their boxes and start chasing.

Talisker

Low Key Birthdays

It was my Birthday on Saturday.  I’m now 6 human years old.  That’s 42 dog years.  As all of you know, Tobermory and I have always had a party to celebrate our Birthdays.  Mummy makes a cake and our friends come over to share it with us and play a casual game of fetch while their humans occupy themselves, drinking falling over juice and consuming human kibble as its antidote.

I have to admit to being a little disappointed when Mummy said that I wouldn’t be having a party this year but understood the reason.  Our friends, Bailey and Sierra’s Mummy has her Daddy visiting from the land where humans wear green and carry little green plants with four leaves.  He turned 84 human years this weekend and they felt this should be celebrated.   That’s 588 dog years and it definitely cannot be disputed that 588 trumps 42.

Through my studies of human behavior, I have observed that as they get older they celebrate most of their Birthdays in a much lower key manner than they did when they were younger.  I didn’t want ours to feel bad about not holding a party for me, so told them I thought it was time that I followed this pattern of behavior.  We went for dinner at a local human feeding station called Aldo’s owned by a human who comes from a land shaped like a boot.  We always get to test bread there, but when Mummy told them it was my Birthday, they brought out a special dish of grilled chicken for Tobermory and me and all the humans that bring the food took it in turns to come over and give me a special Birthday tickle behind the ears.  Maybe this low key Birthday thing isn’t so bad.

Talisker

Bread Season

It’s now the beginning of bread season.  This doesn’t mean that we don’t get to test bread the rest of the year, but when it’s warm and bright outside we get to sit with our humans in the sun at their feeding stations.  You’d think that they’d remember that we need to test it first before they eat it, but no … it’s always the same at the beginning of every bread season.  They need to be reminded of their responsibilities.

Talisker