Help us Help Mummy

10 years ago, long before I was born my older brother, Bowmore told me about when Mummy’s brain fell out.  This is a condition that humans call Stroke.

Our humans went out one day on San Francisco Bay to play chase in floating human carriers, but Daddy came back without Mummy.  A lot of humans don’t know this, but we sense what humans are thinking and he was obviously very unhappy.  Daddy is bad about never putting Mummy on a leash so Bowmore thought she must have got lost somewhere as he went out every day for a long time, Bowmore assumed to search for her.

Mummy wasn’t lost.  She was at a special kennel that helps humans get their brains to climb back in their heads so that it can tell their bodies what to do again.  Brains get forgetful when they fall out so when Mummy came home, it was still learning how to tell her body what to do.  Daddy had to move her around in a chair with wheels for a long time.

Mummy is lucky that her brain works much better now, but it took a lot of hard work for her to retrain it.  When it fell out, not many humans understood what was happening.  Mummy therefore likes to support those who teach others about this subject and help humans who are Stroke victims learn how to retrain their brains.  To do this, it takes a lot of the same green paper that Mummy exchanges for dog biscuits.

In a little over 2 weeks on September 16^th, other humans are going to give Mummy green paper to run and walk 5K to help Peninsula Stroke Association.  Tobermory and I have decided to help out too so we are going to join her and take Daddy along for some exercise, but we need green paper to be able to participate.  We would be grateful for any support you can give us to help Mummy.  We have of course entered under the team name of Whisky Dogs at www.psastroke.org.

Talisker

Maintaining your Figure

My dearly departed older brother, Bowmore always told me that it’s important to exercise regularly, eat sensibly, maintain a healthy weight and visit your doctor to get the juice that stops us from getting sick.  I have to admit to being a little skeptical about the juice because my nose gets a little warm and dry for a couple of days afterwards, but Mummy tells me that means it’s working.

Yesterday I had my annual medical review.  I consider myself to be a pretty fine specimen of a fish retriever so of course assumed that I would pass with flying colors.  I’m pleased to say that my general health is good, but our doctor said my waistline needs a little work.

When Daddy is not away in far away lands, he always gives us breakfast which is really good because he gives us more than Mummy.  For a while now, he’s been earning dog biscuits at our kennel and gives us breakfast every day so it’s been a while since we’ve had to survive on the meager rations that we get when he’s not here.  Of course, we never pointed out that we were getting more food.  It’s a matter of survival.  After all, you never know when something bad might happen and all the kibble reserves dry up.  We would then be thankful for having eaten a little more when there was a plentiful supply.  Apparently, our doctor doesn’t understand this.  Can you believe he’s put me on a diet?

Talisker

A Letter Home

Dear Mom, Dad and my Boy

I just wanted to let you know that I’m OK.  Talisker explained to me that you had to chase the evil black bags with wheels that ran away with your body covers.  At first I was a little upset that you didn’t have faith enough in my tracking instincts to help out, but after Talisker and Tobermory’s humans showed me a picture of all the water that the bags had taken you to, I now understand that you were protecting me from having to face my biggest fear.

Security is a tough job at this kennel.  There’s always a human here and a lot of potential threats walk past which need to be barked at.  This leaves very little time to practice the art of sofa restraint, but I have managed to squeeze a little in and help Tobermory with his technique.

In return, Tobermory has taught me to play crocodiles.  Talisker says he’s very pleased because he’s bored of playing it and Tobermory is quite obsessed with the game.  I have to admit to being on Tobermory’s side on this point.

The boys have taken me with their humans to a couple of human feeding stations to educate me on the finer points of bread tasting.  I would like to point out that I definitely need more practice as I am not sure that I can yet fully appreciate the subtle differences between sourdough and classic French baguette.

Although I’m having fun, I hope you catch the evil black bags soon so that I can return to our kennel.  I really don’t like having to eat my food fast so that the others don’t eat it, and although Tobermory has been very good about letting me sleep in his big bed and is sleeping on his travel bed, I would much rather be sleeping with my Boy.

Sending you lots of  big licks.

Truman

Hospitality

It’s always important to be hospitable to friends in need.  It would appear that ours is not the only kennel in our neighborhood that suffers from being inhabited by evil black boxes with wheels that run away with the human occupants’ body covers.  Our friend, Truman also suffers from this plague.  Of course, his humans couldn’t resist the temptation to chase after them when they ran away last week so he was left at their kennel with only the company of an ill-tempered elderly female mouse catcher who takes great pleasure in giving him what Daddy calls “the silent treatment”.  I understand that females of all species seem to be particularly fond of using this kind of torture.

We of course told Truman that he could come and hang out with us until his humans return.  I have usually only seen him in the sporting setting of playing fetch so it has been interesting to see another side of him.  It turns out that he is an expert in the art of sofa restraint.   He gets to practice more than us as his boy spends a lot of time at a human learning kennel and his big humans are out most days earning dog biscuits, so his security duties are substantially less.  There are also fewer potential threats walking past his kennel and of course there is a sofa in front of a big viewing window so he can conduct his security duties whilst practicing his art.

I would like to think that I could one day reach Truman’s level of sofa restraint expertise but with his father being a lion hunter, he has size on his side.  As fish retrievers, Tobermory and I will just have to accept that we have to practice sofa restraint in pairs.

Talisker