The Wedding Guest

You may remember that in April I wrote about my concern for Mr Bear’s white relatives so you can imagine my surprise when a picture of one of them came out of Mummy’s picture box.

Whilst on their recent adventure, our humans went to a wedding in a place right at the top of this country where not many of them live.  Weddings are a human ritual where they put metal bands on their fingers to show that they are not a stray and shouldn’t be put up for adoption, similar to when they put a collar around our necks.  They make quite a fuss of it and all their friends and pack members come to watch.  I can only assume that Mr Bear’s relative, who I have learnt is called Icabod, must have been a guest too.  I suppose I shouldn’t have been too surprised at this since the wedding was closer to the land he comes from than where Mr Bear lives.

Bowmore

Mouse Catching Aristocracy

Our humans have been really busy since they got back from their recent adventures so hearing about the guys they visited has been slow.

Today, Mummy gave us the scoop on one of our relatives, a fish retriever called Bone who is chief of security for her littermate’s family.  That dude really has it tough.  The most important part of our job is barking at potential threats, but this guy can’t bark because human puppies sleep a lot and adult humans growl at him when they wake up.  The upside is they’re pretty messy eaters so he has a lot of plate cleaning to do but of course, anything in excess can be pretty tiring.

We also learnt about Minstrel who helps Bone with vermin control.  I don’t have much experience of working with cats and found this a little confusing.  We get a few squirrels in our garden which are pretty easy to chase away so I couldn’t understand how such a little dude could be useful.

Being retired and having more spare time than me, Bowmore got on the writing box to do some research.  It turns out that Bone and Minstrel have quite a challenge to deal with as their City has lots of rats and mice as well as squirrels.  Apparently, Minstrel is descended from a long line of famous mouse catchers, the most famous of which is Puss in Boots so it would appear that Bone has mouse catching aristocracy to help him.

Talisker

Dougal, the Paper Dog

Our humans have just returned to our kennel after a long adventure which has seriously hindered my writing career as Mummy insisted on taking her writing box with her.

Before joining Daddy in the far away place where he earns dog biscuits, Mummy went on a short tour of the land she comes from to visit the dogs who take care of her pack.  I would have joined her but in my advanced years I only travel first class and flying metal tubes discriminate against dogs and make us travel third class which I find very distasteful in this day and age.

Mummy’s first visit was with Dougal.  His breed have a lot of energy which he needs because he takes care of her Mummy and Daddy who are almost as old in human years as I am in dog years so they need a lot of help with daily chores like fetching the newspaper.  The land they live in is obviously not very advanced or they would read a writing box like I do to see what is going on in the world.

Bowmore

Humans' seasonal ability to play fetch

I have observed that humans’ ability to play fetch changes with the seasons.  When we have our winter coats they catch the ball and run away with it, but now that we have our summer coats they appear to be getting closer to playing the game correctly, however they still have a lot to learn.  Instead of bringing the ball back to the human that threw it, they throw it to another human so it takes a lot longer to get back to the chief thrower.

At this point I would like to point out that in my many years of taking care of humans, it is my experience that there is always one who just doesn’t play fair.  I feel quite sorry for all the humans who are concentrating hard on catching the ball because there is always one who stands in front of them with a big stick and tries to knock it away from them and then runs away so he can’t get caught.

Bowmore

Feisty Sofas

Our humans are not at our kennel this week so since Talisker’s security duties are reduced and he has some free time his friend, Piccolo has come to stay with his human.  Despite his short stature he can hold his own in a game of chase but when it comes to the art of sofa restraint, the ones in our kennel are particularly large and feisty so he needs a little help.

Bowmore

Catching my best side

Last week I kept the old dude company when he went to visit our doctor (he’s always got something wrong with him).  Daddy told him about my sore leg and he wanted to take some pictures of it.  He obviously doesn’t walk around with a picture box like Mummy because the next day we had to get up really early to go back to see him before Mummy and I could have breakfast.  All she had before we left our kennel was the brown water she drinks every morning which is not good as she growls a lot when she hasn’t had the hot bread she eats with it.

Our doctor didn’t like the picture of my leg which I completely understand because it looked very strange.  I don’t want to boast, but I like to think of myself as photogenic, but he gave me sleeping juice so it’s not surprising he couldn’t get my best side when I was too sleepy to pose properly.

Yesterday I visited a special doctor who obviously has a different taste in pictures as he spent a long time looking at it and was really excited.  I tried to understand what he was telling Mummy (he was using a lot of big words I haven’t heard before) and I think he said he likes fixing sore legs and he’s going to use this picture to fix mine.

Talisker

Blue Teeth

A few days ago, Mummy bought a new talking box.  She always likes getting new toys so you’d think she would have come home happy but instead she was growling quietly to herself.  Daddy says this is because the kennel it came from provides a community service by employing humans who are not able to earn a lot of dog biscuits, and Talisker and I know more about talking boxes than they do.

Having always been inquisitive, I got on the writing box to see if I could work out why Mummy went to a talking box kennel that made her growl and I think I have worked it out.  They sell talking boxes with blue teeth and I think she just wanted to get one that matched my claws.

Bowmore