Bears Eat Free

A few dog years ago when it was cold outside, my brother and I would go quite often with our humans to stay in a kennel surrounded by white slippy stuff.  They like to strap boards on their feet and slide down hills covered in it.

One evening we went out with Daddy for our evening sniff and saw a big black guy called Mr Bear.  We’ve always been taught that it’s polite to introduce yourself to strangers, but Daddy wouldn’t let us.  He told us that the Bear family are not well brought up and are people we really don’t want to mix with.

On further investigation, it would appear that the Bears like to help themselves to human food and have little regard for their property while they are doing so which is the height of bad manners.  They obviously don't have a Mummy like mine.  I tried taking human food a few times, but she’s really scary when she catches me and she always catches me.

Now, I can understand that humans want to protect their property, but I don’t think it’s good for business for human feeding stations to offer to feed Bear’s for free.  I mean, would you really want to eat in a place sitting next to a load of big hairy ill-mannered guys with long claws?

Talisker

Soaking Dead Plants

For all you regular readers, you will know that at the time of year when the air is warm and it’s bright outside, my humans like to go to a field in the middle of our town every week to listen to howling humans.  Personally, I can’t see the attraction but they seem to enjoy it and a lot of their friends join them and share falling over juice with each other.

For the last couple of years, this has been quite stressful for me as a lot of dogs bring their humans.  I had to keep a really good watch out for my old brother to make sure that young dogs didn’t bother him so I’ve really not had the chance to socialize properly for a while.  Now I get to chat and am finding out lots of interesting stuff.  I met a little guy called Rocco.  His pack come from Boston which he told me is on the opposite side of this land and is known for big tea parties.  Humans make tea by soaking dead plants in hot water and it really doesn’t smell good.  Daddy drinks a lot of it which I have never understood but Rocco solved the mystery for me.  Two dog lives ago, Daddy lived in a kennel near Boston.  I haven’t yet had a chance to check on the dangers of tea, but I am a little concerned that he may have developed an addiction to it.

Talisker

Strange Fish

It’s always good to get a little light relief from my busy schedule so I was delighted when my humans told me last weekend that we were taking the motorized dog carrier for a trip to Sonoma.  I’ve been going there with my humans and brother since I was a small pup and know when we’re nearly there because the motorized dog carrier moves slower and the windows open so that I can jam all the wonderful smells up my nose.  Damn!  That place smells good.  I feel quite sorry for the humans because they obviously can’t fully enjoy the experience with those tiny noses.

We went to a falling over juice kennel called Schug Winery.  Usually, my humans just test the produce, but this time they joined other humans to eat very strange looking red fish with claws.  It would appear that when eating these fish it is traditional to wear white plastic scarves showing pictures of them.  And, I have to add that I can’t really see the attraction of eating a fish that has such hard skin that they have to beat it with heavy objects to get the meat out.  What’s wrong with a soft skinned fish like salmon although I have to admit that the hard skinned fish did taste pretty good.

I was hoping that we would be going home after this.  You have to remember that dogs need at least 20 hours of good sleep a day, but they insisted on stopping at Nicholson Ranch to collect more falling over juice so I didn’t even get a comfortable sleep back to the kennel.

Talisker

Beat the Heat

Do you have any idea what hard work it is taking care of two humans all on your own?  I have to keep a constant look out for potential threats to the kennel.  Although Bowmore’s hearing wasn’t too good, I never realized what a help that extra pair of ears was.

My humans have spent the last few weeks complaining about the water falling out of the sky.  I have to admit that we have had a lot of it which really doesn’t help me improve my Frisbee catching skills as Mummy refuses to throw it, citing some problem with my tearing up the green stuff outside.  This weekend has been particularly hot which you would have thought would give my ears a break from the whining, but oh no.  They complained about that too.  Do you hear me complain and I have to walk around in a fur coat?

Luckily, I met this cute chick called Bella who lives with her humans in a kennel with a big hole in the ground with water.  I of course turned on the charm so got invited over to cool off and took the opportunity to show off my swimming prowess.  She was pretty impressed but is not much of a swimmer.  She said something about not liking to get her fur wet, but man, are those California blondes hot.  Did you see the length of those legs?  She’s not interested in a casual fling and I’m just not the settling down type, but if I change my mind, Bella’s going to have to watch out.

Talisker

Becoming my own dog

A little over a week ago, my big brother, Bowmore left our kennel.  Mummy explained to me that he had taught me all I need to know to protect and care for humans so it was time for him to go and keep his older brother, Cider company.  I’ve been keeping watch at the top of the stairs just in case he changes his mind, but after hearing that the place they are at has really slow, fat rabbits and lots of gourmet bread, I’m beginning to think he won’t be returning.

Now it’s time for me to become my own dog.  I have extra responsibility on my shoulders and no big brother to run to for advice.  I just hope that I can do as good a job as Bowmore did for nearly 14 human years.

Talisker

The Energizer Bunny's batteries finally ran out

It is with a very heavy heart that I have to tell all of you that this morning we said goodbye to Bowmore to let him join his older brother, Cider.

In Bowmore’s younger days he was an obsessive frisbee catcher and would keep running until his feet bled if we didn’t stop him.  A few years ago we gave him the nickname “The Energizer Bunny” because he suffered so many major medical issues that for any other dog it would have been difficult to get through, but he just bounced back every time with the same enthusiastic energy that he had all his life.

Over the past few weeks, our beautiful boy had been having some little strokes but every time we thought we were losing him he would greet us the following morning with his persistent raspy bark, devour his breakfast with gusto and then rush out into the garden like nothing had happened.   Unfortunately, this time he just couldn’t fight through it again.  The batteries finally ran out.

Talisker wishes to continue Bowmore's work of documenting his adventures and observations of human behavior very soon, but for the moment needs to take a little time to come to terms with life without his brother to help him out.

Mummy

The Motorized Dog Carrier's Carrier

Did you know that motorized dog carriers have their own carriers?  They only need them when they’re very ill and can’t get themselves to the motorized dog carrier doctor.  Mummy’s was quite sickly when it was very young and had to take several rides on one.

Daddy’s motorized dog carrier has always been healthy and has regular medical check-ups so you can understand my surprise when it was supposed to be carrying us down town for our evening sniff recently and just a few blocks from our kennel made a big cough and refused go any further.  It couldn’t even get back to our kennel to wait for a carrier so we had to walk home which I find really quite distressing.  It’s never made us walk home before.  Daddy appears to be totally unsympathetic.  He says he chose it to carry us because it’s supposed to be a particularly strong breed and is far too young to be so sick.  I hope he’s kinder about me behind my back when I have to visit my doctors.

Bowmore