Becoming my own dog

A little over a week ago, my big brother, Bowmore left our kennel.  Mummy explained to me that he had taught me all I need to know to protect and care for humans so it was time for him to go and keep his older brother, Cider company.  I’ve been keeping watch at the top of the stairs just in case he changes his mind, but after hearing that the place they are at has really slow, fat rabbits and lots of gourmet bread, I’m beginning to think he won’t be returning.

Now it’s time for me to become my own dog.  I have extra responsibility on my shoulders and no big brother to run to for advice.  I just hope that I can do as good a job as Bowmore did for nearly 14 human years.

Talisker

The Energizer Bunny's batteries finally ran out

It is with a very heavy heart that I have to tell all of you that this morning we said goodbye to Bowmore to let him join his older brother, Cider.

In Bowmore’s younger days he was an obsessive frisbee catcher and would keep running until his feet bled if we didn’t stop him.  A few years ago we gave him the nickname “The Energizer Bunny” because he suffered so many major medical issues that for any other dog it would have been difficult to get through, but he just bounced back every time with the same enthusiastic energy that he had all his life.

Over the past few weeks, our beautiful boy had been having some little strokes but every time we thought we were losing him he would greet us the following morning with his persistent raspy bark, devour his breakfast with gusto and then rush out into the garden like nothing had happened.   Unfortunately, this time he just couldn’t fight through it again.  The batteries finally ran out.

Talisker wishes to continue Bowmore's work of documenting his adventures and observations of human behavior very soon, but for the moment needs to take a little time to come to terms with life without his brother to help him out.

Mummy

The Motorized Dog Carrier's Carrier

Did you know that motorized dog carriers have their own carriers?  They only need them when they’re very ill and can’t get themselves to the motorized dog carrier doctor.  Mummy’s was quite sickly when it was very young and had to take several rides on one.

Daddy’s motorized dog carrier has always been healthy and has regular medical check-ups so you can understand my surprise when it was supposed to be carrying us down town for our evening sniff recently and just a few blocks from our kennel made a big cough and refused go any further.  It couldn’t even get back to our kennel to wait for a carrier so we had to walk home which I find really quite distressing.  It’s never made us walk home before.  Daddy appears to be totally unsympathetic.  He says he chose it to carry us because it’s supposed to be a particularly strong breed and is far too young to be so sick.  I hope he’s kinder about me behind my back when I have to visit my doctors.

Bowmore

The End of the World

Apparently, according to a human almost as old as me, the world was supposed to end on Saturday around dinner time.  Nothing happened, but now the old human says we’ve had a reprieve until October 21^st.  Daddy’s really upset about this because his birthday is at the end of October and all his pack and a lot of his friends are hoping to come to our kennel to celebrate.  I think I need to find out who is responsible for this world ending stuff so I can appeal to their better nature.  I don’t think it is too unreasonable to ask them to delay it a couple of weeks so that Daddy can enjoy his party.

Bowmore

Yelping

In my long life I have developed a lot of very strongly held opinions on a variety of topics and feel that it is my duty to make sure that everybody hears them.  To do this I yelp. Yelping is something that all dogs know how to do but some of us are a little more practiced at it than others.  The trick to a good yelp is to start imparting your views to the targeted human in a quiet and calm manner.  Humans can be very thick skinned so if you get no reaction from the human, you need to ramp your efforts up until they finally start paying attention and that I have turned into an art form.

You can imagine my amazement when I learnt that Mummy has started to use her writing box to yelp.  Have you ever heard one try?  They just don’t have the vocal chords or the technique for the job.  If writing boxes think they can take over from dogs, they have a lot to learn.

Bowmore

Commando Dog to the Rescue

When Mummy is outside removing plants that are trying to live in our garden without her permission, I sometimes take the opportunity to use her writing box to catch up with current affairs which is very important when you are head of security.

This week I learnt that one of our cousins helped a group of seals catch a really bad human in a far away land.  It took the seals a long time to find him which doesn’t really surprise me.  I mean, just look at them.  They may be pretty agile in water but why would you send a bunch of fat dudes with flippers to do a job that needs agility and speed on dry land.  No wonder they had to call in canine support.  If a whole unit of commando dogs had been sent in at the beginning, the bad human would have been caught a long time ago.

Talisker

Mending Humans

On Tuesday morning, our humans left the kennel really early without giving us breakfast.  Daddy came home a little while later without Mummy.  He said he took her to a doctor to be mended which I found a little confusing because she didn’t look broken to me.

You can always tell when we have been mended because all our fur disappears around the zipper that the doctor uses to get inside us but it is much more difficult to tell with humans because they are just not very furry.  The only indication we have that Mummy has indeed been mended is that when she returned to our kennel yesterday she was moving much slower than usual.

There hasn’t been the need for human mending in our kennel since Talisker took over as head of security so I am delighted that at last I have had the opportunity to teach him the correct nose positioning for optimum human recovery monitoring.

Bowmore