Orphaned Royal Canine Security Experts

Last week the top human from the land that mine came from, went to join past members of her canine security detail in the place where they have been taking care of her human mate.  I am sure they were all very excited to see her, but I worry about the orphaned security detail she left behind.  They have been particularly vigilant in their duties, admittedly being handsomely rewarded for their hard work with adventures all over this planet, lots of cuddles from a wide section of society and gourmet treats.

I have been reading on the writing box how much humans will miss this special female, but there is not enough written on the heartbreak of her canine companions.  I know how important it is to be cuddled by your Mummy every morning when you wake up and get ear scritches and give kisses at regular intervals during the day.  These orphaned Royal canine security experts will miss their Mummy more than any human can understand.

Arran

Dog Days ... really?

Last night when we were watching the moving picture frame on the wall, I heard the human who predicts what the sun is going to do describe the weather right now as dog days.  He went on to say that 110°F was no temperature to let dogs go outside in.  I’m confused.  In my mind, holding down the sofa all day while the humans play with their writing boxes in dark rooms with the shades closed, not being allowed to play outside and not going out for our daily neighborhood sniff until the sun has gone to bed after the humans’ feeding time does not have the makings of a good dog day.

Tobermory

Behave Your Age

I had a sore leg last week.  My doctor gave me some magic treats to stop it hurting and ordered me for a few days to concentrate on the skills of sofa restraint and supervision of human meal construction.  I pointed out that would mean that I would have to trust Arran to properly exercise Daddy in the evening, not to mention that I would also be neglecting my duties as his tutor in the important art of retrieving. When Daddy throws toys for us, it is very important that I get to them before Arran to demonstrate correct catching methods.  Would you believe my doctor then had the audacity to suggest that I need to behave my age?

Tobermory

Covid Puppy turned Jazz Hound

When I visited our doctor last year to get the juice that stops me getting sick, she said I’m a classic Covid puppy.  I needed to look it up on Mummy’s writing box to understand what she meant.  I learned that because of the human biting problem that started before I was born that confined them to their kennels and had them wearing muzzles when they were allowed outside, I didn’t get to go on enough adventures to meet other humans and their canine security detail.

Well, that has now changed.  For the last few weeks, every Wednesday evening we go to a big garden in the middle of our town where lots of humans gather, sitting on folding chairs drinking falling over juice and eating human kibble while listening to a small group standing on a big table in the middle of the garden, one howling and others blowing bent metal pipes that make strangely enjoyable noises.  It’s one of the types of noise that makes some humans get out of their chairs and wiggle which I’ve always found amusing.  I overheard one saying it’s called Jazz.  I guess that means that I’ve turned from a Covid puppy into a Jazz hound.

Arran

Martley Hall Stud – the hot UK vacation spot for horses

Last month Mummy went on an adventure on her own for seven whole days and left us alone with Daddy.  I didn’t like it.  How can we perform our security duties properly if the family unit is not in the same place?  Daddy obviously didn’t have enough to do without her around, so I helped him out by only eating breakfast when he spoon-fed it to me to take up a little of his morning time.

Now, I know what you’re thinking … where did Mummy go?  She’s done this twice since I started studying security protocol under Tobermory.  I decided I need to know more about these adventures and her writing box seemed the obvious place to start my investigations.  I was in luck.  She keeps details of everywhere that she goes on it.

I’ve learnt that Mummy travels in a flying metal tube to go and visit her litter mate and her pack in the land where she was whelped.  To my relief I found out that there’s a pretty tight security detail protecting them, so my concerns for her safety were unfounded.  They all live on a special horse resort called Martley Hall Stud where very fast horses go for vacations or to rest and be pampered before and after they have their puppies.  I’ve never seen a horse puppy.  I checked Mummy’s picture box, and sure enough, here’s a picture of horse puppies, although Tobermory did correct me … horse puppies are called foals.  I don’t understand why they have such long, skinny legs.  When I was a puppy, I had short, fat legs

Arran

The Last of the Three Amigos

It was a sad day today.  My old friend, Truman went to join my dearly departed brother Talisker.  He was his BFF and I’ve known him my whole life.  We went on adventures together, accompanying our humans and sampling the local bread while they tested falling over juice, we watched them slide down white slippy stuff with boards attached to their paws and had sleepovers at each other’s kennels.

Truman and Talisker are back together on an adventure in a place where the rabbits are slow and fat, the frisbees and balls plentiful.  I am now the last of THE THREE AMIGOS.

Tobermory

What do you call a baby goose?

When Mummy goes on her weekly foraging trip for human kibble, on the way she drops us off with Daddy at a huge field with a big hole in the ground with water in the middle of it.  It’s one of our favorite places to go for a sniff.  We meet other security details out exercising their humans and lots of big birds called geese vacationing there, visiting from a cold place in the north.

Recently on one of these outings, the big birds were accompanied by groups of baby birds thatlooked like fluffy yellow balls with legs.  Tobermory says they’re called goslings.  That doesn’t make much sense to me.  Everyone knows that more than one goose are called geese and not gooses, so shouldn’t more than one gosling be geesling?  If Tobermory is correct, then maybe I’m really a dogling and not a puppy.

Arran